A Wedding Day - 18 September 2010

It has been raining for three straight days in the Sydney area during this October long weekend for NSW, the last such one before Christmas. In contrast, my thoughts spontaneously remind me of a wedding day in the middle of the first month of a southern hemisphere spring. The bride, Ely, looked positively elegant and contentedly radiant.  Her groom, Ray, exuded calmness, confidence and assurance. The day had brilliant sunshine and blue skies, accentuated by the Sydney skyline and the calm river waters when viewed during the commitment ceremony held at the Ballast Point Park in Birchgrove.

Much had gone into planning and logistics for this special day. I am impressed with the Ann who led the team of friends to get the restaurant venue set and ready for the wedding dinner requirements - and she only had 90 minutes to do so before the evening reception on the very day itself. To an observer, the day's ceremonies had been a blend of the heritage and emphasis of today's Australia, Chiuchow customs, Fujian emphasis and Straits Chinese traditions. The bridal dance at the wedding reception was the culmination of a series of festive practices that began with the offering of tea by the bridal couple to elders in the morning.  There were eight in the bridal party, with the groomsmen and brides maids carrying gift baskets. East Asian tea offering procedures are laden with protocol, a specially concocted tea mix and offer a formal introduction to relatives in the extended families.  Against the backdrop of more relaxed Aussie thinking (where addressing someone of any age by the first name is more positive), the bridal couple are asked to address the tea cup recipients by the formal labels they are expected to call them from then onwards.

I have not seen cousin Andrew Chan from Brisbane for a few years now - and I am especially glad of the opportunity that day to see him arrive with his own version of the three generations.  Sebastian and Teegan are his grandkids, bright-eyed and close cousins. A daughter remained in Cape York that weekend, but I had the chance to say hello to his and Ann's other two children. Ann remains the quintessential Queenslander, resourceful in country living, having a dry sense of humour and creative in hobby pursuits.

Ballast Point Park was breezy at times in the late afternoon, but that could not subdue the mood of those gathered to witness Ely and Ray's signing of the book, very public bonding kiss and significant new stage of life. It could have been a Norman Rockwell painting moment, updated and removed from this  iconic American term. Ray's mother wore a gold embroidered blouse front while Ely's mother, my cousin Susan, stood out in her streamlined Mandarin-inspired sleek dark outfit. Aunty Pat Yap was a bit busy introducing her grandchild Ben Butcher to the congregation. Ely's brother Ming was manning the finger food and drinks table, which had some particularly delectable items that soon ran out. Ray's brother Brian looked slim and dashing with his dark shades and tanned looks.

The setting for the wedding reception was highlighted by the diversity of guests, the band in attendance and the love underlying the speeches. At the end of a happy and meaningful day, amongst other things, the chair covers and accompanying ribbons had all been taken out by restaurant staff members in about ten minutes; the bridal couple, accompanied by their parents, had gone around toasting and taking photographs with guests of around 25 tables; the e fu noodles served was particularly appetising, apart from the compulsory seafood in a ten course southern Chinese styled banquet; and waiters had forgotten to open the champagne bottles on time, despite requests.

The wedding cake was presented in two round shaped levels and had exquisite coloured paintings of love birds on a canvas of white.  Michael Buble was there, in cover version, as belted out by an impressive performer, Liam Burrows, from the Chatswood High School Jazz Combo.  To the combo, it was a special evening as well, one Ben leaving the combo for university and another Ben having his very first public performance with the group at the same time.

Ely's godparents, Nancee and Vinu, had travelled all the way from San Jose, California to grace the occasion.  Vinu gave a short, simple but loving message.  The best man, Richard, utilised a Powerpoint slide show.  The parents of the groom spoke in dialect to engage specific members of their wide spread Sydney community.  A holder of the Order of Australia, Frank Chau, graced the dinner with his presence and address.  The father of the bride, Boo Ann, had a grateful inner glow as he articulated his words of congratulations, joy and contentment to his only daughter and her well chosen soul mate.

Two days before the enjoyable Saturday, I accompanied cousin Kheng Chye to the Australian Bahai Temple in Terry Hills, on the northern outskirts of the Sydney area. We looked intensely at the weaved and complex designs adorning the walls of the worship hall, topped by a high domed ceiling that reminds one of Greek Orthodox, and containing well laid out chairs like in an Anglican church. Outside, its gardens were landscaped and manicured like in a Buddhist inspired plan. This beacon of calmness sited at a high vantage point overlooking Sydney's Northern Beaches made me reflect on the main purpose and message of Ely and Ray's wedding day - the love in their hearts as they embark on this significant affirmation of their journey together. 

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